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Thursday, July 19, 2007

Sweet Gabbers

Well she is back to being pink and real squishy. They have had to pump her full of fluids again, but this time is to stimulate pee. Looks like Gracie and I wil be back to the pee pee dance. Gabi is peeing ok, but not stellar. We still have a long ways to go, everyday I wonder how I will make it to the end. I know in my heart I can, but everyday gets a little harder. You would think at this point it would be getting a little easier, but it is not. I am so dedicated to being here all day everyday that the things I am used to doing around the house for my family are starting to show I am not there. Don't get me wrong Jason is doing an incredible job around the house, but I feel like I need to be there more to keep up. Afterall he is working all day everyday and I know being here by Gabi's side is exactly what I need to do for her and my sanity, but now I am feeling overwhelmed at home. And I am not talking house work, all of it, I feel bad for being there, I feel bad for always being here...This is a daily struggle, we are basically starting over again and wow I thought we were finally moving forward...WRONG, we are still just sitting and waiting... I HATE THAT GAME, I am learning very quickly I am not as patient as I thought I could be. I feel like I am slowly breaking down to about nothing...I pray that God will give me more strength, but more importantly heal my baby girl so she can be back home where she belongs!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

“God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way.”

Anonymous said...

I love you and I am so proud of you Micah. You have been patient and it's okay to feel tired and over-whelmed. It's just crazy that we continue to think that we must be happy and in control all the time...only God is in control and he sends reminders everyday. Gabi will be just fine and so will you. Just a little longer...you can do it! You survived Buckle-world...you can survive this!!! Don't make me breakout my Beyonce song..."I'm a Surviver"!!! I'll do it...call me when you need support or to vent...i'm here for you! Love you, Erica

Anonymous said...

Hang in there Micah. I know from experience that is easier said than done, but you are a strong person. You have already proven that, look how far you have come. Don't feel bad about not being at home, I know it is hard but that just shows what a dedicated and caring mother you really are. You are where you are needed most right now and it's so understandable why you choose to be there. Feeling tired and frustrated is only normal for a person going through such a difficult situation and it is ok to feel that way, you are only human. You all continue to be in our thoughts and prayers. Take care, and have a great night. Sweet dreams Gabi.
Nate and Amy

Anonymous said...

Micah,
You do not personally know me, but I feel like I know so much about you after reading your blogs. (I went to school with Jason from 1st grade all the way through high school. I have so many stories that I could share with you! :-)) Everyday that I read this blog I am amazed at the strength and dedication you show to your daughter and the rest of your family. You are doing so much, and it is natural after time, that even the strongest, have to have a breaking point. If you didn't, you wouldn't be normal. :-) You will be fine and so will Miss Gabi!! You are an inspiration to so many people by the strength you are showing for your little girl Gabi, and the rest your family. God is watching over you and the rest of your family. No matter what you are faced with you will make it through. God gave Gabi to you for a reason...he knew you would be the best for her....and you are!!Hang in there girl! Things will get better! You are all in my thoughts and prayers always!

Becky (Robbins) Hackett